October 23, 2014

Thoughts on THOTs

Am I too old already?  Maybe I'm over it, can't be bothered already at *almost* 30.  I kept seeing THOT on the internets, so of course I  had to look it up.  Did you know that means That Hoe Over There?  How very degrading.  Attractive women are now sideline furniture.  Cute.  That table over there sounds about the same to me.  I see a lot on the assorted media available about how feminism is over, and its not needed.  Everything is status quo, there's no such thing as a Rape Culture.  Go back to your televisions.  It concerns me deeply when I'm talking to a veteran teacher about a student's bullying problem, and they don't know him by name but by dress, and say "Well if he dresses that way then I'm not surprised he's a target."   WHAT?!?  In what universe is victim blaming ok?  He's a boy in high school that wears makeup and sparkly pants.  He's a nice kid, but he can't go to school without threats of physical harm.  Why?  Because of the way he presents himself.  It physically sickens me.  "She was dressed like a slut, no wonder she was raped."  "He's a fag, no wonder he got his ass kicked."  I guess I don't get it.  Isn't there supposed to be more tolerance now?  Aren't people supposed to be more aware of bullying, and the consequences?  From suicide to Columbine, there are a lot of them.  How long does it take to climb out from oppression?  Wait, never mind. 

September 26, 2014


I'm horrible at strategy games.  Ridiculous amounts of horrible.  My cousins all wanted to play chinese  checkers with me when we were kids because I always lost.  A few years ago, a person I was dating tried to teach me chess.  I will play games like that for the fun of it, but I go in knowing I'm going to lose.  By teach, I mean call me names and make fun of me the entire time and refuse to be useful.  So he captures most of my pieces, and laughs at me until I told him I could win in one move.
Jerkface - "There's no way."

Me - "No, seriously.  In one move."
Jerkface - "How?  I don't believe you."

I upended the board, scattering pieces everywhere while yelling, "Sheblam bitch I win!"

Jerkface - "What the f&*: Cody?!?  You can't win like that!"

I sat down calmly in the ruin of gameness.  " Yes, I can and did.  Weren't you looking?" I replied.

Jerkface was sputtering, " But... but... that's against the rules!"

"Says who?"

"Its in the rulebook!  You can't win by just throwing the board!" He was really starting to get angry now.

"Well, I have a book that says woodland creatures live in a medival abby and have adventures.  Is that true too?  I think you're just mad I thought of it first." 

I left him red faced and sputtering. 

September 6, 2014

Bucket List

Ever since the movie "The Bucket List" came out, I've been hearing people talk about theirs.  A bucket list is a list of things you want to accomplish before you die.  Maybe its because we are American this idea appeals to us so much.  Our jobs and industries, culturally, have no real meaning anymore.  We work too long at jobs we hate to buy crap we don't need.  A bucket list gives us a sense of purpose, and makes us feel like we've lived life.  Me personally, i love lists.  So of course, I'm working on mine. 

1- Quit smoking

2- Take Tristyn out of the country.

3- Publish a book, even if I'm selling it out of my car.

4- Be fluent in Spanish again.

5- Learn to speak Italian, then go to Italy.

6- Sing on a stage

7- Visit Russia

8- Ride a speedboat thru the canyons in New Zealand

9- Play with a member of the large feline family

This is what i have so far, but I need ideas.  For gawd's sake, I'm going off Dr. Dorian in Scrubs.  Do you remember that show?  Better question- What is on your bucket list?  Tell me in the comments!

September 3, 2014


Off my schedule, out of my mind.  Its the first week of school and now I have to get up at 6:45am, do meal planning, etc.  Puke.  Sometimes this stuff makes me want to run screaming into the hills.

So, I stayed way too late at my friend Kathys.  Ooops.  Its been nothing but stress in my house.  First week of school, tension with Marcus, scheduling, forgetting to walk the dog then he trashes the house multiple times because he's a bored airedale.  Also a douche-dog.  Bah!  Don't forget the 5,000 other things I'm worried about, like being overweight and needing new glasses.  I can't sleep.  My internal clock is still on summer, but the child person gets all whiny if you don't feed him.  In fact, if the food isn't forthcoming, there's 2 cats, a dog, a cockatiel, & a 7 yr old all yelling at you.  Every time I thought I wanted a baby (except once) I've gone out and gotten a furry one.  This ends up with lots of fur everywhere, but cheaper than kids.  Less work if you keep to cats.

August 30, 2014

100 Posts!

In the spirit of our 100 post milestone, I will be revamping the blog!  Please let me know in the comments things you like, things you hate, etc.  We are getting a serious makeover!  Whooo!

And now, onto the regular content: What pisses me off today. Today, I saw a gofundme that reeeeeeeeaaaalllllyyyyy irritated me. These people have 6 Kids together, and one more they pay support on. She is a "freelance" tatoo artist (kitchen tattoo anyone?) And he works. Ish. I guess. I don't know man, but when I hung out with him in my early 20s his Grandma paid his bills. Anyway, I guess they moved into a new house and now the Mom and youngest both have medical bills, which sucks. But they can't pay for all of these things now, so they're elicting money online. Alms, alms for the poor, and you don't even have to leave your house to beg for money now. Nice, right? Now they say that they need the money for medical bills, which i get. But they go on to talk about their new house they have to pay for, and I saw some bitching they'd only raised $150 or so. Granted we have a broken healthcare system, but its fucked up to talk about how you need money for your sick baby (why in Goddess' name do you have 7?!?) and you really need money for your new house and bullshit. Ugh. I'm not going to say poor people shouldn't have kids, or nice things.  Its pretty fucking stupid to have your own baseball team when you're poor though.  Kids are horrifically costly, both money wise and time wise.  Every time you have a child, you play roulette with a multitude of potential issues, even if you have no family history.  That ups the cost significantly.  I also saw them talking about how they don't qualify for assistance.  With that many kids, to not qualify means they are bringing in quite a bit of money.  They posted that if everyone on their friends list donated $25, they'd have $3,000+ because they really need it.  Yeah, who has an extra $25?  And if you do, do you give it away?  Me personally, I give to charities, usually involved with animal rescue.  In order to receive monetary help from any place I've ever heard of, you have to fill out applications and bring in lots of proof you're poor.  Not so with gofundme.  So what do you do with spare money?

August 29, 2014

Flare Town

Population : Me.  I feel good, then an hour later I'm down.  I'm folding laundry, Next I'm nauseous.  Id say I wish it would pick something, but it usually picks comatose.  I feel like I never really get anything done.  I'm so tired.  I sleep a lot, and still feel tired.  Sometimes the only time i feel well enough to function its time for me to go to bed so i can get up and take care of the Mr. Man.  I feel bad for not being a better housekeeper, or active parent.  I can be boring.  Ah, well.  I did have a fun moment with Marcus yesterday.  We were joking around, and I entered "buttsex" in the search bar on Netflix.  This is what happened.

Yes.  Magic School Bus is totally what I meant. 
In other news, school is starting .  Any parent of a special needs child can tell you that can be a special slice of hell.  Not only do we have to start in with a new schedule, but new busses, new class helpers, etc.  Wheeeeee.  So by the time Tristyn the boy gets used to his schedule and new people, its Christmas break.  

August 8, 2014


Jimmy Buffet was right, fruitcakes are everywhere, and where the fuck are THE JUINOR MINTS!?!  We need people that care.

My friend Rayne has a rainbow tail.  That's right, a fricken rainbow tail.  I want one!  Also, I really need a pair of those kitty ears that scan your brain and move.  With yer BRAIN WAVES.  Scifi fans get excited, we are one step closer to fully functioning cyborg costumes that you can run over all of those assholes that talked crap on Star Wars.  Ha ha bitches! 

On another note, there are some weird people out there.  Seriously weird people.  Not just your run of the mill, People of Walmart weird, there are some seriously deranged individuals out there.
From the Why-didn't-I-think-of-that insane:
Canary Suicides, the new dust collector
I've been waiting since 1985 for this shit!

To the what-the-hell-did-I-just-see:
Bacon is officially everywhere
I am the rainbow fox!

That's your moment of zen, people.