March 29, 2015


Flare day!  Yay!  Yay because I can still feel pain which means I'm alive.  I can get out of bed today, even though I feel sick every time I stand up.  I am alive.  ALIIIIVE!  I have a neighbor that lost part of his foot last week due to not taking care of himself and his diabetes.  I look back on this last week, and all of the crying and praying to realize I am blessed and continue to be blessed.  I have a good life friends and neighbors.  I have an extensive family from the Hiskey, Wait, Ross, Bland, Allen, Pieroni, Hoffman, Barelle, Gonzalez, Gordon, Wright, Harmon, Sexton, Williams, Brodbeck, Bennett, Neubauer, Morris, Brown, and so many other last names.  This is just off the top of my head and in no way includes everyone.  How much time have I wasted feeling alone?  Wow, the list surprises me.  I am getting my house fixed up, I have a wonderful and hilarious kid, and the sweetest boyfriend that I only want to bury in an anthill some days.  Good times girl.  Now just to figure out my purpose in life...

Have you ever thought, I'm __ years old and I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'M DOING WITH MY LIFE!!!  Aughhhhh!!!

So 30 has been a bit weird for me.  I keep thinking I'm not in my 20s anymore, I have an 8 yr old that I have to teach to get along in the world and I still feel like a homeless artist with no paint.  BAh!  I have found some paint, in a way.  My yarn.  I made a shawl for my grandma Louise with different stitches in the brightest barbie pink I could find.  Grandma has Macular Degeneration and she can see bright colors.  I'm currently working on a rainbow blanket and it feels so good.  I've been researching fiber crafts and pioneer arts.  I find it fascinating when people can take pretty much nothing and make something wonderful from it.  I'm learning to do that with food too.  I was raised by a working mom, so we did a lot of microwave food.  Now i'm learning the joy of real flavors and food made of, well, food.  I'm thinking of documenting that journey here as well.

Blah spring break.  I'm going to bed.