I'm horrible at strategy games. Ridiculous amounts of horrible. My cousins all wanted to play chinese checkers with me when we were kids because I always lost. A few years ago, a person I was dating tried to teach me chess. I will play games like that for the fun of it, but I go in knowing I'm going to lose. By teach, I mean call me names and make fun of me the entire time and refuse to be useful. So he captures most of my pieces, and laughs at me until I told him I could win in one move.
Jerkface - "There's no way."
Me - "No, seriously. In one move."
Jerkface - "How? I don't believe you."
I upended the board, scattering pieces everywhere while yelling, "Sheblam bitch I win!"
Jerkface - "What the f&*: Cody?!? You can't win like that!"
I sat down calmly in the ruin of gameness. " Yes, I can and did. Weren't you looking?" I replied.
Jerkface was sputtering, " But... but... that's against the rules!"
"Says who?"
"Its in the rulebook! You can't win by just throwing the board!" He was really starting to get angry now.
"Well, I have a book that says woodland creatures live in a medival abby and have adventures. Is that true too? I think you're just mad I thought of it first."
I left him red faced and sputtering.
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